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Raise your hand if you love criticism. We didn't think so. But raise your hand if you love praise. It doesn't matter if you're a student or an educator — hearing what you're doing right is a great motivator. We asked an expert the best way to offer praise so students can use it as fuel to continue to grow.
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On the Board: Praising Students
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How much praise is too much praise? Can praise ever backfire? Should you reach out to parents, too, or trust kids will talk about your praise at home?
We asked Dr. Jillian Lucas Baker, DrPH, EdM, Executive Director of CPTC and co-host of A Tribe Called Fertility, a podcast that focuses on maternal health in Black families, how to tell students they're doing a good job.
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Dr. Baker looks to research to see if praise is a teen motivator. "Teens need regular, positive affirmation from important adults – like their teachers! When they get it, they not only do better in school but are more connected to the valued adults in their lives."
Make the praise about their strengths, not the product of those strengths, so they know how to keep doing a good job. Dr. Baker states, "When you recognize your students’ strengths, you help them feel good about themselves and position them to understand their capacity to do the right thing and work through challenges."
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Match the Praise to the Person
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Give praise whenever you notice someone putting out their best effort. Tailor the praise to the student:
- If your student is shy, consider offering praise in private.
- If your student needs public recognition, consider offering praise in real-time so they can see "the connection between their behavior and your affirmation."
So what constitutes praise? Dr. Baker says, "Praise can be in the form of kind words, a star of the week, having lunch with a student, or giving a small gift, such as a journal."
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Should teachers tell parents about the praise, or leave it up to their students to share at home? Dr. Baker recommends: "As a mother of two preteens, I love to hear from a teacher that my child has done something kind or helpful. This allows parents to reinforce the teacher’s praise to their children at home and reaffirm core values and character traits."
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We asked teachers across America to “tell us how you let teens/students know that they're doing a good job.” Here’s what you had to say:
- “We want students to struggle, problem solve, and rise to various challenges. When you are praising students, whatever age, we want them to understand that their learning is more important than the product. We know that relationships are the most important factor in a child’s success — building motivation, creating safe environments, and improving behaviors. Our job as an educator is to build relationships with the students and families. Part of that work is sharing and celebrating when students grow and praising that growth.” —Jamie, assistant principal in the East Williston School District in East Williston, NY
- "Honesty is essential. No undeserved praise, no blowing smoke. If I praise poor or mediocre performance as good, what words are left for good performance? That said, I always try to find something positive to say, even about suboptimal performance. If something is so insufficient that I can’t find anything positive to say – not even about creativity, imagination, or effort – I am going to do two things: deliver feedback orally instead of in writing (writing being easier to misconstrue) and frame it in the sense of a need to re-do the work." —Carl, Radnor Township School District in Radnor, PA
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We want to highlight the great work happening inside and outside of the classroom as you flex those communication muscles.
First, on the topic of praise, we want to hear about educators you know (or yourself!) that we should be interviewing. Hit reply to this newsletter and tell us about them.
Then, answer next month's question:
Question: Teens are trying to answer the question, "Who am I?" and they look to adults for ideas. Do you let your students see you as someone with interests both inside and outside of the classroom? How do you share your passions with your students?
Drop your answer over here: https://forms.gle/YJ5W6mYMu2kshgjL7
We’ll choose some of your answers and feature them in the "What About You?" section of the next newsletter.
Warmly,
Center for Parent and Teen Communication
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