How to Build Confidence About Showing Vulnerability

When leaders reveal their trip-ups and failures, they are seen as more approachable and less arrogant. But being vulnerable isn’t easy. In this article, the author explains how to show “confident vulnerability” and offers three ways to open up. It starts with using language — with ourselves and with others — that helps us remember that learning comes with practice. At these pivotal moments when we are feeling vulnerable, we need to use phrases like, “The brain is a muscle that gets stronger with practice” or “Nobody ever walked before they fell.” This language lets leaders model that it’s human, and normal, to learn and make mistakes. You can also create long-term improvements in your team’s psychological safety by sharing some of your personal developmental journey. Talk to your team about times in your life when you stumbled and got constructive feedback that you needed to improve and adapt. Revealing these learning moments signals that you are not threatened by feedback. And finally, show moral humility. By showing appreciation for the moral strengths of others, and by acknowledging that others have more knowledge and skills in solving ethical dilemmas, a leader initiates moral focus and dialogue, but disarms followers’ perceptions of moral superiority. Confident vulnerability means that leaders can put their self-doubts to work for them.